Sep 23, 2013, 2:18 PM PST
Just when you thought you’d seen true stupidity, another idiotic turn of events comes around and smashes its way into the news cycle like a bottle of bubbly across the dome.
It took less than three days before someone upstaged the antics of 49ers outside linebacker Aldon Smith. Blowing twice the legal limit at approximately 7:00 a.m. BEFORE a team practice and AFTER crashing a car is up there, but as Forrest Gump says, “Stupid is as stupid does” and the NFL does stupid so very well.
Smith’s incident happened on Friday. Before he could enter himself into a substance abuse program, two more incidents stole the show.
On Sunday, news broke that Broncos outside linebacker Von Miller tried to swap out a urine sample while appealing a drug suspension. Miller apparently tried to conspire with a urine collector to beat the system. Miller was suspended for a diluted sample in the first place and he already got in trouble in 2011 for a different positive test. At least he wasn’t caught with “The Whizzinator.”
Early Monday morning (AKA shortly after the strip clubs close), TMZ reported that Baltimore Ravens wide receiver Jacoby Jones was injured in a brawl on a party bus. On the bright side, the Ravens players weren’t drinking and driving. They were, however, reportedly loaded onto a bus with a bottle-wielding lady named “Sweet Pea” and her friends.
During the bus bash, Ms. Pea(?) reportedly hit Jones over the head with an Armand de Brignac champagne bottle. According to the report, when Jones’ friends tried to retaliate, offensive tackle Bryant McKinnie stepped in to stop them and a fight occurred. McKinnie was also involved in the Minnesota Vikings “Sex Boat” scandal.
Smith has been placed on the 49ers non-football illness list. He faced the media after Sunday’s game and admitted that he had a problem and vowed to fix it. He is an exceptionally talented football player, but he has been involved in several incidents already. Maybe he can find a way to make better decisions. Unfortunately, it takes a huge mistake before a lesson is learned and in some instances it’s too late to make a true change.
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